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Health — Comments Off
19
Oct 12

How to Scientifically Slow-Down the Aging Process: 6 Bowhead Whale Secrets

ABC News reported on December 20 that three bowhead whales were killed by Inupiat Eskimos in northern Alaska that were estimated to be 135 to 172 years, while a fourth bowhead was believed to be 211 years old. Scientists figured out the whales’ ages by studying changes in amino acids in the lenses of the eyes.

This might have shocked some people, but I’ve known about whale immortality for a long time.

You see, I’ve spent the last 12 years studying the slow aging processes of certain fish, turtles, and other non-aging invertebrates. I know of rougheye rockfish that live over 205 years (Cailliet, 34) — and of a 190 year old turtle that probably has some stories to tell (Bowler, 11).

What We Know About Slow-Aging Animals
My research has led me to a staggering discovery: these animals can not only live long — they are practically immortal if they can be protected from certain predators and starvation. And that is why I’m studying thousands of rougheye rockfish in my laboratory. I’m seeking to prove that these fish are immortal if protected from the outside world and fed a perfect diet of fish food pellets that I created. In a more controversial study, I’m working toward getting approval to take care of one of the largest bowhead whales in the world.

About 4 years ago, I was approached by a leading vitamin and body lotion company and asked to work on some anti-aging products based on my research of these immortal invertebrates. I’m releasing that vitamin and body lotion line very soon, but before the release, my P.R. team suggested that I develop an article on the secrets of bowhead whale longevity to get people thinking about the potential to live forever.

So here are 6 secrets I’ve learned from Bowhead Whales on how to live over 200 years old without aging spots or wrinkles:

1. Submerge Yourself in Sea Water
Everyone knows the healing power of ocean water, and I encourage everyone to soak up sea water every day. I realize that many people can’t go to the beach each day, so that’s why I suggest that everyone soak in my ocean water bath salts (soon to be available at Bed, Bath & Beyond). I also suggest using one of those hand-held spray bottle fans to mist your face, arms, and legs with sea water throughout the day. You’ll be surprised how much better your skin and body will feel.

2. Enjoy the Night.
I move to Alaska each fall so that I can live in darkness just like bowhead whales. Radiation from the sun is killing you, and Bowhead whale’s know that the secret to living longer is staying in the dark ocean far from the sun. You still need vitamin D, so I have a suplement to help you enjoy the benefits of sunlight without aging yourself.

3. Stay Cool.
Bowheads know that heat destroys, but ice heals. And that’s why they spend their time time in icy Arctic water. They enjoy swimming in the southern edges of Arctic ice in the Winter, and racing through broken and melting ice during the Summer. I realize that not everyone can afford to fly to the arctic every week, and as a spokesperson and scientist for change – I need to travel a lot. So turn on your A/C full blast, and always put a big cup full of ice between your legs as you drive, cover yourself with ice packets whenever possible, and hang out in big freezers at your local Price Club, Costco or Wharehouse Food Store. I’m developing a “Bowhead Ice Body Suit” that will be the perfect way to keep you cold every day.

3. Rub Your Body with Barnacle Cement
Barnacles attach to whales using a cement released through the tips of its antennules. This secret cement that is covering the bowhead whale helps him look like he hasn’t aged a day. And that magical cream is available to you as well. I lather up each morning with bottle of barnacle lotion to help my skin heal faster while reversing the age spots, wrinkles, and sun damage on my face. It is amazing.

4. Consume Planktonic Organisms Everyday
An average Blowhead is consuming about 2 tons of plankton each day. They know that plankton is the food of the gods — and consume as much as possible. I just finished working on a similar product, called the “Blowhead Planktonic Smoothie,” which blends together copepods, amphipods, euphasiids, and a variety of other colorful crustaceans into one icy smoothie drink. It tastes fantastic, and will help you feel younger almost instantly.

5. Travel Often.
Migration is seasonal for Blowheads, and they travel to improve their mind and learn about the world around them. Traveling helps you understand other cultures, and helps you see the world. If you don’t have the money to migrate, it’s still important for you to keep your mind learning about other places and cultures. That’s why I’m producing a DVD series (with teasers soon on YouTube) showing you what Blowheads see during their travels. To help navigate your way, we have a funny animated barnacle named “Barney” that will tell you what’s going on.

6. Listen to Ocean Sounds.
We live in a world filled with noise pollution, which can aggravate our anxiety levels and age us faster. A bowhead whale instinctively knows that sound can hurt us, so he stays submerged deep in the water where he can listen to beautiful sounds of the ocean currents and whales communicating with each other. I have a music mp3 series coming out on iTunes that replicates the ocean sounds that a Bowhead hears through a synthesizer (and features the angelic music of Yanni).

By following these 6 steps, you’ll be on your way to living longer and reversing the aging process.

References
Cailliet, G.M. et al. 2001. Age determination and validation studies of marine fishes: do deep-dwellers live longer?. Experimental Gerontology 36, 739-764.

Cuervo, A.M., Dice, J.F. 2000. Age-related decline in chaperone-mediated autophagy. J Biol. Chem. Oct 6;275(40):31505-13.

Klapper, W., Krupp, G. et al 1998a. Telomerase in ‘immortal fish’. FEBS Letters (Federation of European Biochemical Societies) 434, 409-412.

Health — Comments Off
18
Jan 12

How I Trained to Become a UFC Fighter in 183 Days

As a fitness trainer, I’ve studied the Rocky training clips for years — and knew through determination and hard work I could achieve anything I put my mind to. So about a year ago I decided to pursue my dream of becoming a UFC fighter. I gave myself a goal to accomplish this dream in 9 months. But due to my amazing determination and will-power, I achieved this goal 3 months early.

Here is how I did it:

Get in the Mindset.
You want to be a UFC figher, you got to get into the mindset. Put down your purse, and it’s time to He-Man-up. Look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are the best. Tell yourself that you can kill anyone with your bare hands. Tell yourself that nobody can stop you (with the exception of me). Write these words on your mirror and recite everyday for 15-minutes. Believe and you will achieve.

Buy Tapped-Out Clothing
You want to be taken seriously at the gym and wherever you go. You need to start wearing Tapped-out beanies, tangtops, shorts, arm bands, handkerchiefs, and whatever you can get your hands on. If you want to be a UFC champ, it’s time to start dressing like one.

Find Your Hulk-Like Anger Button
Every fighter needs something they are fighting for. For Rocky, he kept thinking about his dead trainer Mickey. For Mike Tyson, he kept thinking about getting teased as a kid. You need to think about something that really upsets you – and keep that implanted in your mind so that you want to kill anyone who gets in your way.

Get an Old White Trainer
All the best fighters had old white coaches. Rocky had Mickey Goldmill, and Mike Tyson had Cus D’Amato. You need to hire an old white trainer to give you the training you need. He will tear you down and build you back up into the second greatest fighter of all time.*

Study WrestleMania Fight Clips
If you want to improve your motivation during a fight, you need to have the crowd cheering for you. That’s why you need charisma like Hulk Hogan, Macho Man Randy Savage, and the amazing body of the Ravishing Rick Rude. These guys knew how to get the crowd on their side, and you need to watch their fights to learn their strategies.

Give yourself a stage name.
The Undertaker, Andre the Giant, Muhammad Ali, and Peter “The Professor” Buckley knew that their stage names helped them mentally become the fighter they wanted. Give yourself a tough-guy name, just make sure to speak with an attorney to avoid conflicts with other WWE or UFC fighters.

Final Thoughts
The biggest part of winning a fight is mental. I don’t care how big or strong you are — I will destroy you with my bare hands. I can say this because I have the self-confidence and brain power that will make my thinking a reality. So fight and destroy anyone who gets in your way, except always know that you can’t beat me. Peace Out.

*I’m the best fighter of all time.

Survival — Comments Off
27
Jul 11

How to Survive a Grizzly Bear Attack

In this guest post, Mountain Man Jim “Bucksaw” Hurr provides practical tips on dealing with a jilted grizzly bear based on his 18 years living in Alaska’s bear country.

As a mountain man, I spend most of my time living alone in the wilderness.

Like St. Francis, my time is mostly spent communing with nature and helping injured animals that I find on the trail.

During this time, I’ve befriended arctic foxes, rabbits, a few wolves, and even a depressed, overweight bearded seal on the coast. I’ve had more than a few run-ins with jilted grizzly bears, and I’ll share with you my humane methods of chasing them off without guns or knives.

1. Stare the bear down.
Grizzly bears love a staring contest, and the contest winner sometimes helps determine who will win the physical fight. It’s all about self-confidence and not being intimidated during the stare. Keep your eyes locked on her eyes, and use telepathy to mock her. If you have never been in a staring contest, I recommend practicing on rabbits, dogs, and even small children before attempting a staring contest with a grizzly bear.

2. Identify yourself and then fall down dead.
If your firm stare doesn’t scare her away, tell the bear who you are. Make it very clear why you are on the trail, and why you need to continue moving on. Point to your heart and explain that you need to get back home because you feel you might be having a heart attack. Pretend to get all sick, dizzy, and then drop down dead. Many angry grizzly bears want a fight and will probably just leave when they realize you’re dead already.

3. Tease and laugh at the bear.
If the bear doesn’t leave you alone after playing dead, stand up and just start laughing at her. Point your fingers, laugh, and make sly comments on why her lover probably left. Mention her terrible breath and poor grooming. By teasing and laughing, you’ll tear down her self-confidence. Many bears will run away feeling self-defeated, depressed, and sometime suicidal.

4. Threaten to kill the cubs and use the fur for couch pillows.
As a man of peace, I don’t like making crude threats, but some grizzly bears won’t back down — and that’s when you need to get nasty like them. First, ask her if she knows for certain where the cubs are at that exact moment. Then tell her that you know where they all sleep, and if you’re not left alone — you will slaughter them all. Follow this up, by miming the process of sneaking into her den at night, killing all the little cubs, removing their fur, and making several furry pillows for your couch. Most bears will leave you alone by the time you begin miming the process of adding pillow tassels (which is considered poor taste).

By following these four strategies, you’ll be able to chase off any bear you meet on the trail.

Management — Comments Off
23
Jul 11

How to Hypnotize Your Boss: 6 Hypnotic Steps to Getting More Respect, Money, Power, and Even That Corner Office

In this guest post, Maxwell Terentino, a professional hypnotherapist in St. Albans, Vermont, provides mind-altering strategies through neuro-hypnotism to aid in improving your work conditions.

After 14 years of using hypnotherapy to help my clients with various types of anxieties, I learned that the root of many social anxiety issues was simply not having enough money.

You see, money can help an anxious person feel more secure because they have the flexibility to pay for whatever they need. Money is the antidote for anxiety and depression, not pills and hypnotherapy.

So I began training my clients on some groundbreaking methods to hypnotize their bosses into getting promotions, bonuses, and the money they’ve always wanted. And this method has been extremely successful in helping my clients achieve more wealth and respect they thought possible. They have also been very generous with me by sharing a % of their first year’s salary increase as agreed prior to teaching them this hypnotic method.

Here are 6 steps to put your boss into a highly-suggestive state:

Step 1: Build rapport with your boss.
The first step in hypnotism is make your boss feel comfortable with you. The goal is to make sure your boss is feeling relaxed, and not defensive. Tell him or her a few funny stories to get some laughs — and even give him or her a scented candle gift to aid in relaxation in the office.

Step 2: Begin talking in a deep, calming voice.
As you talk with your boss, begin adjusting your tone and tempo so that you you begin talking slowly and with deep voice. You want your boss to start to hang on your every word, and to feel very comfortable with the words you are saying.

Step 3: Tell your boss that you’d like to show some family photos.
There are a variety of ways to start a hypnotic trance, but I’ve found that using James Braid’s original eye-fixation hypnotic induction method works easiest. The goal is to get your boss to stare at a shiny object above their forehead to produce the greatest possible strain and encourage them to maintain a steady stare. Tell your boss that you want to show some recent family photos on your smart phone. Slowly wave the phone about 15 inches away from their eyes — and watch the pupils. Wait for the pupils to dilate and soon to close involuntarily. If your boss is having trouble focusing on the picture, you’re on the right path. Play some Yani music to aid in relaxation as you show different pictures.

Step 4: Use positive reinforcement while showing pictures.
As you talk about the pictures, mention how “relaxed” and “calm” you were with the family. Throw in some positive reinforcements like: “you’re doing a good job” and “you are totally relaxed and at peace right now.”

Step 5: Once trance begins, suggest the things you want.
Once your boss is in a trance, you can begin suggesting the things you need — and how getting more money, better position, and new office space, would bring more happiness. In fact, suggest that the more money you get, the happier and more joyful your boss will be. Suggest that your boss write an email to the whole company about how valuable you are to the team — and how each word of the memo will multiply the amount of happiness and pleasure your boss will feel. Suggest how much more money you want, the office you desire, and even that you need more time off to spend with family.

Step 6: Emerge your boss from hypnotism through counting.
Once you’ve suggested everything you want, tell your boss that at the count of 5 they will awake completely at peace and thrilled with your work performance. As you count, make your voice louder and louder so that at 5 you are talking in your normal voice (and are just finishing up a funny story about something that happened the previous weekend. Your boss will think he or she just dozed off, but will be feeling great about your work.

By following these 6 steps, you’ll begin acquiring everything you’ve ever wanted at your job.

Lifestyle — Comments Off
19
Jul 11

A Navy Seal’s Guide to Sleeping Less & Getting More Things Done: 6 Eye-Opening Strategies to Make You 800% More Productive

In this guest post, Markus Dell, a retired Navy Seal, provides 6 practical tips on how to scientifically adjust your brain’s circadian clock to require less sleep, feel more energized, and get more things done in your day.

As a Navy Seal, we were taught that our circadian rhythms can be psychologically and physically adjusted to require much less sleep. On earth, our bodies have evolved to adjust to a 24-hour solar clock — but if we lived on Jupiter, we would only need about 2 hours of sleep per day (due to a 9.84 hour solar clock). This equates to about 4.2 hours of sleep for every 24-hour period.

Large prey mammals (e.g. cows, giraffes, elephants, donkeys) have already adjusted to this 2 to 4 hour sleep cycle because they know that sleep is an evolutionary disadvantage to them (Allison & Cicchetti, 1976), which is why some cattle appear to never sleep at all (Balch, 1955). Thankfully, there have been some huge leaps in human evolution for people like Thai Ngoc and Al Herpin who proved that sleep is not required — and always complete everything on their daily task lists.

Through my Navy Seal training and research in prey animal sleep behavior, I’d like to share 6 key ways to train your brain and body to sleep less to help you stay more productive at work, home, or at school:

1. Snack on acacia leaves.
Giraffe’s only require 2 to 4 hours of sleep per day, and have learned that chewing on acacia leaves all day and night provides the energy they need to keep them alert. The constant eating and rumination keeps them awake. Next time you’re feeling tired, put down your Red Bull, and chew on some Acacia leaves. If you are unable to find the leaves near you, you can buy vitamin supplements.

2. Be determined to stay awake.
The need for sleep is 85% mental, and staying awake simply requires determination. Like a hungry rat will bite through drywall to get to a helpless baby, you need to stay just as determined to stay awake. Burn yourself with a cigarette. Poke your eyelids with toothpicks. Peel off your toenails. Do whatever it takes to keep yourself alert.

3. Sleep during blinks.
The average person blinks about 17,000 times a day. And what better time to get “shut eye” than during a blink. If you are motionless and blinking, you’re essentially asleep. I trained myself to sleep in each blink so that I don’t need to sleep, and you can do the same with practice.

4. Stretch your neck.
As we discussed, Giraffe’s sleep less than 4 hours a day, which is 2 hours longer than a Navy Seal (but not bad for an untrained animal). Giraffe’s know that stretching your neck is a way of forcing the body to stay awake to survive. In fact, many cultures have used this neck-stretching technique with rings to help them stay awake, too. My chiropractor recently informed me that through continued neck-stretching adjustments with him, I will reach my goal of not requiring any sleep at all.

5. Drink 10 gallons of ice water per day.
Giraffe’s consume about 10 gallons of water per day, which helps keep their bodies stay awake by constantly digesting. Drinking ice water not only helps you stay awake, but will help you lose weight since your body will burn 70 calories to warm 8 ounces of ice water.

6. Live in fear of death.
Prey animals have trained themselves to stay awake because they equate sleep with death. Giraffe’s only sleep for a minute or two at any given time because a giraffe’s sleep posture essentially tells predators to “bite my neck and eat me.” You need to instill the fear of death in your mind to help you escape the desire to sleep.

By following these 6 strategies, you will eventually train your body to require less sleep so you can stay more productive and get more things done in your day.

Productivity — Comments Off
15
Jul 11

A Honey Bee’s Guide to Time Management

Honey Bees are amazing creatures. They have been around for millions of years — and are the only insect that produces food for humans.

Bees work harder than any person on the planet, and one worker bee will spend her entire life working to make just 1/12th teaspoon of honey.

Executives ask me all the time for tips on helping them manage their time more efficiently. That’s why I developed a groundbreaking lecture on how to excel at time management and productivity based on my research on worker bees at the University of California, San Diego.

Here are snippets from my 2-hour time management course:

Nap more. Sleep less.
If you want to stay productive, you need to follow the example of a worker bee that spends her entire life working. She collects pollen and nectar during the day, and works all night in the hive. These bees take very brief naps, and constantly work to avoid getting punished by the Queen Bee. In fact, Benajmin Franklin had a similar nap philosophy after studying bee colony habits.

Live like you only have 42 days to live.
The average worker bee will only live for 6 weeks. From the moment she is born, she knows the clock is ticking (Harder, 22). She’s got 6 weeks to live her life before she’s dead. Some people I know would feel very anxious and worried, but a bee just moves on with her life and tries to be as productive as possible. You’ll never find a depressed bee because they don’t have time to be depressed. They simply deliver as much pollen as they can for their community before they die.

Always Be Collecting.
Bees work on a merit system and rewarded based on the amount of pollen they collect. They are responsible for collecting as much pollen as possible, and encouraged to visit 50 to 100 flowers per collection period (Kawaguchi, 23). The worker bees that deliver the most pollen each day are rewarded with praise from their peers, while the bees that delivered the least amount of pollen are shunned from the community and asked to stay outside of the comb for the night (Klein, 65). It’s brutal life, but it’s nature’s way of keeping them productive and motivated.

Consume only honey.
A bee survives on honey, and I suggest you do the same. Put away your vending machine food, and sip on pure organic honey. Fill your mouth full of honey and let it just ooze down your throat. You’ll be amazed at how fast your body will absorb this medicine and watch how your body performs. You’ll have more energy, and be much more productive by only consuming honey.**

Work in a matriarchal corporate environment
I know this sounds unorthodox, but executives need to hear this: bees are successful at being productive because they live in a matriarchy under the strict rules of a queen. Angry women are much more scary than angry men. It’s a fact of nature. Think about how a mother bear will protect her young. In a bee hive, bees are threatened with harsh punishment if they don’t continually work. Bees caught napping too long will end up in the darkest caverns of the comb and kept in isolation for 15 day minimum (which is ⅓ of their lifespan). The screams from within these caverns are frightening, and no bee ever wants to get sent there (Yokoi,45).

For my complete presentation “Bee on Time Management,” I’ll be announcing DVDs and CDs very soon. Subscribe to this blog to keep updated.

**Please consult your doctor before beginning this energizing new diet.

References

Harder, L.D. (1983) Flower handling efficiency of bumble bees: morphological aspects of probing time. Oecologia 57, 274–280.

Kawaguchi, L. G. (2006) Do bumble bees save time when choosing novel flowers by following conspecifics?. Functional Ecology 20(2)

Klein, Barrett (2008) Caste-dependent sleep of worker honey bees, The Journal of Experimental Biology

Yokoi, Tomoyuki (2008) Recognition of scent marks in solitary bees to avoid previously visited flowers. Ecological Research, Phil. Trans. R. Soc. B March 12, 2011 366:703-708

Parenting — Comments Off
14
Jul 11

How to Stop Toddler Tantrums Instantly: 4 Ways to Quickly Stop the Crying, Kicking, and Parental Defiance

In this guest post, Jennifer Koh, a mommy blogger, provides 4 tactics for quickly stopping tantrums in seconds.

As a mother of 5, I know how difficult toddlers can be. One moment that can be happy and laughing, and the next they can melt down like me on PMS.

I’ve read practically every popular book dealing with strong-willed children — and how to handle their tantrums and defiant behavior. I tried everything from “time-out sessions” to allowing them to just throw a fit in public while I simply walked away until they got scared and came running after me.

However, after years of research and talking with other parents, I finally figured out a variety of ways that keep my children under control (just like I got my wife’s yippy chihuahua to keep quiet by having his vocal chords removed).

Here are 4 proven methods that will help you keep your child under control:

1. Take advantage of your child’s pressure points.

The first time I saw Spock use the “Vulkan Nerve Pinch” to render someone unconscious, I knew he was on to something. Spock even used a pressure-point pinch on a horse-like creature, so I knew controlling a toddler would be a piece of cake. Study a pressure point map of the human body to learn all the places that can be used to inflect instant pain on your child with just a gentle pinch. Your child will literally curl up into a little ball and stop his or her tantrum in seconds.

2. Use hypnotherapy.

My hypnotherapist suggested working with each of my children to help them with their outbursts and strong-willed behavior. I provided each child with three hypnotherapy sessions with her, and my therapist provided me with “trigger” words that instill severe pain and discomfort the moment they do something disobedient. This has worked extremely well when they begin to throw a tantrum. My child will literally get paralyzed in pain the moment I use a trigger word to stop whatever behavior I don’t want them doing.

3. Use chimpanzee disciplining tactics.

Dr. Jane Goodall studied how chimpanzees quickly discipline their young while in captivity, and was impressed with the ‘harmonious relationships’ between parent and child (Goodall 1963). In many ways, chimpanzee disciplining techniques are far more evolved and effective than our typical methods. You see, chimps in captivity feel social anxiety when being observed, and seek to quickly end inappropriate behavior in their young quickly to avoid further embarrassment (Goodall, 1962). Common chimp disciplining tactics include: cold water baths, forcing defiant chimps to hang from a tree branch for one or more hours, withholding bananas and fruit from them for several days, and forcing them to do hard labor (e.g. stack large boulders and tree branches in a pile). These methods quickly teach strong-willed chimps to follow the rules.

4. Never discipline the same way each time.
In the past, I would always give my kids “timeouts,” but soon discovered that keeping the discipline unknown was far more effective. There is a fear in the unknown, and I let my kids dwell in fear all the time since they are never quite sure what I will do to them after disobeying me.

Through using the above tactics, you’ll quickly gain control over your child and reduce tantrums and outbursts in seconds.

Lifestyle — Comments Off
13
Jul 11

How to Double (or Even Triple) Your Self-Confidence By Growing These Mustaches, Beards and Side Burns

Research suggests that facial hair is worn to enhance a man’s marriage prospects by increasing physical attractiveness and perception of social status (Barber 261). By simply growing a healthy mustache or long side burns, a man becomes more self confident, social, and able to handle stressful situations more easily (Robinson 1137).

Here are some attractive facial hair options to help you gain the self-confidence you never thought you could have:

1. The Beard of Eternal Youth & Contentment

There is no question about the manliness of John Muir (naturalist, explorer, author, and beard-wearer). He grew a full-beard to keep him warm at night, which also served to shelter small animals that were drawn to him while he slept. In fact, he wrote during his travels in Alaska, “Every man should wear a thick beard round his face; for the beard brings eternal youth, contentment, and kindles your evening fire. Grow a beard and no harm will befall you (Muir 233).”

2. Seductive Mustache & Fearless Unkept Sideburns

Quint knew that combining a manicured mustache with unkept sideburns would ignite passion and excitement from both woman and marine life. This paradoxical pair at once shows refinement along with intoxication with the wild.

3. The Joyful Beard

Charleton Heston knew the joy and pride that a healthy beard brings a man. Just look at how his beard brings him sheer delight and happiness. He literally radiates joy, and people are magnetically drawn to him because of this amazing smile cradled by the joyful beard.

4. The Irresistible ‘Stache (Carefully Separated from Beard)

Che Guevara was a man who knew how to win any woman’s affections. His furry beard beckoned woman to come and caress his strong chin and carefully crafted mustache. Even his enemies were humbled by his facial hair — and they felt weak before him. Adding a cigar to the mix was the siren’s call that made him irresistible to even infants.

5. Merry Mutton Chops & Gentleman’s Mustache

Not everyman has the willpower and fortitude to grow a mutton chop of this caliber. And the ability for the chops to cross paths and join a manicured mustache takes a certain degree of skill and moral character. Wealth, happiness, and good fortune will follow you all your days when you achieve this hair pattern. Even if unable to grow a beard like this — you will gain a certain heavenly grace for even attempting to have this noble appearance.

6. The Colonel’s Sublime ‘Stache and Beautiful Goatee

The Colonel had a weak chin, but knew that the addition of a strong goatee and whimsical mustache would hide this small imperfection. The shape and position of the goatee psychologically caused one’s eyes to look down in a humbled state (and it is physically impossible to give the Colonel eye contact over 10 seconds without looking down). Burl Ives tried to achieve this look, but wasn’t able to achieve the same sublime stare that is now selling fried chicken around the world.

7. The Charming Mustache

No article about facial hair would be complete without mention of Thomas Magnum’s charming mustache. He was a man that enjoyed living a dangerous life helping the unfortunate. His thick mustache could kill flies on impact, and careless fleas have been known to be lost for days by accidentally jumping into it. His mustache gave him the confidence to be shirtless often, and live the life every man dreams of.

Survival — 1 comment
12
Jul 11

How to Pick a Lock with Your iPhone: 4 Simple Steps

As a former Navy Seal, I had to learn how to pick all kinds of locks. Here are the steps that we learned on how to pick a lock with an iPhone:

Step 1: Disassemble Your iPhone

Step 2: Find the object that looks like a paper clip

Step 3: Bend wire into a key-like shape.

Step 4: Slowly wiggle into key hole.

After a few twists and turns, you’ll feel the wire slip into position so that you can easily turn the lock. It might take you a few minutes, but keep twisting it in until you feel it slide right in.

When you are done, simply reshape wire back into original position and re-assemble your iPhone.

Management — Comments Off
11
Jul 11

How to Resolve Office Conflict: 7 Dance-Battle Moves You Should Know

At some point, everyone is going to have conflict in the workplace.

And while office conflict can lead to delinquency, substance abuse, and gang involvement, conflict can also have positive results by increasing productivity and helping everyone understand each other better.

As a management consultant, I teach employees how to deal with office problems in healthy ways — and I show them movie clips of how kids on the streets deal with conflict through dance battles (e.g. Stomp the Yard, You Got Served).

Dance battles are actually highly-effective ways to engage your office opponent and seek resolution to a problem without resorting to drug-use and violence. Here is a list of popular dance movies you should know to help you express yourself the next time you have an argument at work:

1. Side Jerk

I think the “Side Jerk” is a great way to open a dance because it’s confrontational with arms bent up, while your legs move in and out marking your dance territory.

2. Knockout

Give your opponent a taste of your aggression with this “knockout” dance move that gets you into a boxer’s stance. This shows you mean business. You could also use the “Punch Out” dance move if you prefer (as performed in Soulja Boy’s “Crank That” performance).

3. UFO Front

The “UFO Front” tells your opponent that you don’t agree with what they are telling you, and you feel like their thinking is from outer space. Move your hands above your head in “cop stop” pose while moving your arms from left to right.

4. Big Boss

If you’re a subordinate, use the “Big Boss” dance move to mock your superior. And if you are the boss, you can show power over your subordinate by looking down on them with this killer move.

5. Make Way

Tell your opponent to get out of your way as you climb the corporate ladder with this arm-waving move that pushes them away with a sweeping motion.

6. Head Way

Tell your colleague at work that you need some breathing room with this “head way” move that moves your arm above your head to show that you’re just trying to get through your day without all the drama.

7. No Worries

End your battle with a “No Worries” move that shows your opponent that everything is “all good” and you’re at peace for whatever decision is made. This dance move shows that you’re all about love and peace in the streets. There’s no need to shed any more blood.

You see, dance is always a great way to deal stress and a healthy way to end workplace conflict. The next time you have a conflict with a co-worker or boss, turn up your computer speakers on full-blast with “Where is the love?” by the Black Eyed Peas and get your groove on. Peace out.

drvl.org Deep Reflections for Victorious Living